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February 09, 2011



Gosh, how I can relate to your feelings. Between the refereeing and losing my "me time", I have really had a struggle (honestly for quite a few days now) keeping myself in a good frame of mind. I am wholeheartedly convinced that days would be one-thousand times easier (for me personally) if I could live in close proximity to other moms with small children. Sure, I can get thru an hour or two of activities at home by ourselves, but I usually peeter out when the kids get tired and cranky - and then want to go hide somewhere by myself for awhile. We all have strengths (mine would be art, music, and reading), but I feel bad about my lack of cooking, weakness in losing it while mediating between our girls, etc. It's not easy, sister. I sometimes wish I had had the girls at 18 so I'd have boundless energy :)


Ha ha. Just thinking how us modern-day moms are always convinced we are doing a terrible job. I will freely admit sometimes the favorite parts of my day are driving to and from work because OH GOD NO SHOUTING NO CRYING NO BURPING NO NOTHING JUST BLESSED SILENCE. And the other day when our TV was stolen, Matthew kept getting all up in my face and I looked at him and said 'oh my god, you simply must shut up now.' So, yeah, I hear you. I just try not to get too hung up on the day-to-day battles, because, Jesus, time goes by so fast, and I don't want to look back and have regrets about getting too hung up on that stuff. But some days, god, it's hard.

Jeanie Portinari

After reading your post I am sitting here laughing hysterically!!! Clearly I have you fooled if you are "jealous of how easy she seems to manage the time with her kiddos". I have the BIGGEST struggles with these two boys and every day I hope that this will be an easier day than the one before. I also keep waiting for the brotherly bonding to really kick in, but I fear I may have to wait until they are adults for that. To me they seem to try each and every day to kill each other.

I think the best thing that I have done is having a theme each week. I realized that we have so many toys, books, puzzles, games that get over looked and so this was my attempt to help with that. So maybe it is animal week. Sunday night Jonah will help me pull out all of the animal stuff and that's what we do until the end of the week.

My biggest struggle is with Gavin. I actually feel sorry for him some times. When we are home we are trying to get my to-do list checked off, I'm not sitting down working with him or playing with him. With Jonah I did a great job of doing that, but with Gavin not so much. My goal most of the time is letting him do whatever will appease him so that I accomplish what I need to.


Believe me, you are not alone. I struggle every single day and at the end of the night I wonder how much therapy they are going to need as adults and if I will be the main cause of it.
I try my hardest to make sure I get me time each day because I believe it makes me a better mother/wife/person. It doesn't always happen but I do try.
You are not alone in your struggles Kirsten, just keep your head up and try the best that you can.

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